Kids movie choice.....All I can say is Smurf this! I was Smurfing bored throughout this whole Smurfing movie despite Hank Azaria and Neil Patrick Harris. There was just nothing magically about this Smurf adventure. The story was tired .....Let's just bring the Smurfs to modern day New York and have Gargamel chase them around. It was basically a rip-off of Enchanted without the magic or fun. Yet it made a ton of money and had a sequel. What do I know? I was never really a fan for the original cartoon Smurfs series back in the day--so I wasn't looking forward to a Smurfs movie and after this dull Smurf adventure--I will try and avoid part 2. Your kids may Smurf this movie, but I just thought it was a Smurfing waster of my time.
A millionaire invites a group of people to spend time at his mansion. One of them he claims is a werewolf and he is determined to figure out which one by the end of the weekend and hunt and kill them. "The beast must die" he loudly proclaims in overly dramatic fashion. The film is kinda of cheesy and yet kind of interesting at the same time. It is more of a who done it with a twist than a horror movie with a little bit of The Most Dangerous game thrown in. The main actor played Calvin Lockhart is so over the top that I found his performance enjoyable. The film also features horror legend Peter Cushing as one of the possible werewolves. The end of the movie the 4th wall is broken during a 30 second werewolf break where the audience is asked to guess how the werewolf is like some cheesy Castle Films stunt. Enjoyable nachos with 1970's cheesy sauce.
Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis are typical married men with struggling marriages. The sex isn't happening so much anymore and they are caught eyeing other women in front of their wives. The guys are overheard talking about how much they would pay to have a fling with no consequences during a poker game, their wives played by the beautiful Christina Applegate and Jenna Fischer let them have one week hall passes from their marriage.
The haves figure the hopeless fellows will just come crawling back within a few days when they figure out how good they actually have it. One week where they can go wild and basically have a free pass to do whatever they want. I was expecting the movie to be a wilder crazier comedy than it was--but was pleasantly surprise at the route the plot took instead. The movie actually had a really good plot and the funnier moments came from the lack of any game that the guys had on their week long hall pass, of course I don't know why anyone would want a hall pass if they were with Christina Applegate or Jenna Fischer. For example one of the best scenes was the first day of the guys hall pass when their jealous married buddies come along to watch them pick up chicks at an Applebee's and they end up just eating a ton of food and going home early instead.
Best Quote from that scene.
Friend: "Are you sure Applebee's is the best place to meet hot women?"
Rick: "You thinking Olive Garden?"
The movie was funny and yet subdued and intelligent in its choices. It was definitely a pleasant surprise and definitely a comedy I recommend. I found myself actually cheering for Owen Wilson when he decides not to hook up with the insanely sexy and beautiful Nikki Whelan (a Blond Australian actress that would make most men with they had a hall pass) which is a credit to the film and its story.
Despicable Me 2 cleaned up at the box office earning over 360 million domestically and almost a billion worldwide, which means a Despicable Me 3 is probably on its way soon. I personally thought it was just a very average animated movie. It wasn't even as good as the first one which was also very ordinary. At least the first one had the Willie Coyote type action sequences between the two villains. Now Gru (voiced again by Steve Carrell) is a father figure and no longer has the evil that made him entertaining the first time around. Apparently all the audience needs is a bunch of random Minion scenes which the kids seem to love. The minions are a bunch of bumbling yellow creatures that mumble incoherently and look like beans. They are slightly funny --but not funny in the way that say Olaf is the blockbuster Frozen. I guess maybe once again (with the exception of How to Train a Dragon) Dreamworks animated humor just doesn't work for me. Despicable Me 2 despite its success just left me feeling nothing and confirmed once again that I'm definitely a Pixar/Disney kind of guy.
Here are my thoughts on the original Despicable Me
Three Strangers was an interesting film about 3 strangers that gather on the night of Chinese New Year and make a common wish to the Chinese goddess of fortune and destiny concerning a sweepstakes ticket that one of them had purchased. The movie then follows their individual stories and bad luck that follows there meeting. It ends with all of them meeting up again the day the ticket wins. The movie stars Sydney Greenstreet, Geraldine Fitzgerald, and the always mysterious Peter Lorre. The tale includes murder trial, a husband that is cheating on his wife and an attorney that has lost of his clients money. The acting is excellent and the story keeps the viewers interest as we wait to find out how their tales will weave back together in the end.
Let is Snow was a decent, yet easily forgettable and very predictable holiday movie. It stars Candice Cameron as an executive that works for her dad's resort company that is sent to write up a report on a quaint little family owned ski lodge in order to assess how it can be transformed into a money making big resort. She ended up falling in love with the son of the former owner, the place itself and the spirit of Christmas. The problem with the film was that she falls in love with the place and the son too quickly. There is really no transformation or drama to the piece. The plot was set up to be a transformation for her character, but it doesn't really seem like there was a conflict or hurdle in that transformation.
This movie was basically a Christmas version of Groundhog’s Day with a magical focus on the 12 Days of Christmas.The movie stars Amy Smart and Mark Paul Gosselaar .A women passes out on Christmas Eve in the middle of a department store after being sprayed by perfume.She finishes out the day after making a series of bad decisions alone with her ex’s dog.She wakes up the next day on the floor of the department store again (just like in Groundhog’s day) and has to live the night over and over again until some magical force decides she finally got it right.It was a cute holiday movie which was interesting because of its magical storyline…. (Who hasn’t wanted to relive a day in hopes of a different outcome? ) The story worked well, but feel short of some of the elements that made the movie it copies such a classic. In Groundhog’s day the main character as played by Bill Murray became a much better person as a result of his experience.His character went through a much bigger change so the ending was more satisfying.I didn’t really feel that Amy Smart’s character needed to go through a big character transformation, she wasn’t an unpleasant person at the beginning of the story, but instead just unlucky in love.
According to the description which made me hit record on the DVR the movie was about bikini clad assassins taking on a saboteur. This low budget attempt at a spy movie features a group of women that are a part of an elite unit that is enlisted to take out a sinister ex agent that is trying to threaten the world.
The movie itself is quite dull, despite the sound track that tries to make you think that something interesting is happening at all time. Someone walking up a staircase isn't exciting just because there is a hip non-stop drum beat in the background. Almost every single scene has this fake James Bond music attempting to fool the viewer into thinking something exciting is going on when nothing exciting is. The movie even has a terrible sounding Bond wannabe song in the end credits that was almost laughable.
The acting is pretty bad which you can get a sense of in the trailer (Not SO Bad it is Good unfortunately). The action in the movie is silly and cheeseball. The action scenes feel like something out of a badly choreographed episode of the A-Team. This movie may have inspired the TV series Charlie's Angels (a much better product) and Quentin Tarantino was influenced by it when coming up with the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad in Kill Bill. (the film didn't seem like anything inspiration worthy to me).
The villain has a plan to take over the world by releasing rats with the plague strategically throughout the world , luckily the Doll Squad wearing outfits out of a Bruce Lee Kung Fu movie assault his compound and save the world before his fiendish plot can take place..
Mission Impossible 4: Ghost Protocol 2011 6 out of 10
This is the fourth adventure for Tom Cruise as Ethan Hunt.
Ghost Protocol was a good solid action movie, but I wasn't as impressed as everyone else was apparently. The story focuses on Ethan Hunt and a team of agents that basically trying to stop a rouge nuclear launch while under the radar since they are blamed for an explosion at the Kremlin. The action sequences (despite Cruise's awkward running style) were good. Jeremy Reener did a good job as the reluctant ex field agent that ends up a part of the action. The movie just lacked for me some of the cool elements that I had really enjoyed in Mission Impossible 3. Mission Impossible 3 which I had watched earlier this year got me interested in a franchise that I had bailed on after the dismal Mission Impossible 2 which I. Ghost Protocol was good... just not to the level of James Bond or even Tom Cruise's own (over the top and silly) Knight and Day from 2010. It wasn't even as good to me as some of the really good episodes of the Spy -comedy TV series Chuck. It treaded too familiar ground in many scenes like ----let's have the hot women seduce and steal the codes from the rich bad guy....which quite frankly was done better on Chuck and recently with a twist on Agents of Shield.
The story just didn't capture me as much as Mission Impossible 3 which had a much better villain. The missile scene at the end seemed ridiculous, anyone who has seen War Games would know that a missile launch like that would have an immediate response so I just couldn't buy into. For every interesting sequence like the car parking structure battle at the end of the film that worked really well---there was an uninteresing one like the chase through the sandstorm just didn't work. I'd say it is worth checking out if you like spy movies, but I definitely wouldn't rate it as highly as most people do. I'd say it ranks 3rd amonst the 4 Mission Impossible films.
I loved the first 2 Hangover movies, so I was really looking forward to the Hangover 3--but ended up missing it in the theaters. Well I didn't miss much. The Hangover 3 felt more like a money grab than an actual inspired sequel. The had already covered the same ground with Hangover 2 basically repeating the first movie but in a different setting. Many complained about this--but I actually thought it worked really well. The Hangover 3 was missing that "Dude Where's my Car" element that the original stories had. That element of the characters trying to backtrack and find out what happened the night before in order to solve the crazy mess they had stumbled into. The Hangover 3 goes a completely different direction and teams them up with Mr. Chow in a gold bar heist. This story though action packed wasn't as interesting or as funny as the situations in the first 2 flicks. The movie felt more like a retirement tour --just putting the characters from the first 2 movies through the uninspired paces of a not that interesting story. Too much Mr. Chow (better in small doses) and not enough laughs. The movie should have started with the clip at the end---that would have made a much more interesting story.
Starring Glen Ford...The Big Heat is a solid film noir about a detective who finds out the suicide of a fellow cop was actually a murder. Then the person that tells him this information ends up dead as well. He is warned off the case and doesn't listen which ends up in personal tragedy for him. Then he sets out for revenge.
The movie also features a great performance by a young Lee Marvin as one of the ruthless bad guys. I find myself always liking good guy revenge stories. I like to watch the guilty be punished and this is exactly that kind of film. Definitely a film noir film worth checking out.
The Beast of the Bering Sea 2013 4 out of 10 The Bering Sea Beast.More like the Boring Sea Beast.It is basically a shark movie, but instead of sharks the main characters end up battling Sea Vampires.And by seas vampires what I mean is some Manta Ray looking creatures that look like they are made out of tar thanks to the cheesy digital effects.
These sea vampires that come from the sea –can fly and waddle around on land as well as they tryto suck the blood out of the humans that disturbed their underwater cave while dredging for gold.The acting, dialogue and effects are cheesy, but not to the point of being enjoyable.The music was actually decent and added to scenes that would have been dull based on the visuals alone.It was just hard to be even remotely scared by this silly looking monster that wrapped up their victims like a scene from the original Clash of the Titans.There was a scene where a baby one burst out of one of the characters chests just like in Alien. All in all this is no Sharknado .... Not even close. Movie Facebook page is here https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Super-Fantastic-Terrific-Page-of-Movies-TV-and-Entertainment/178708865473822?hc_location=stream
George Romero's return to the genre is a mixed bag. On the heels of the excellent Hollywood remake of his Dawn of the Dead, George comes at this zombie movie with something a little different. I guess it basically follows the next logical step from Bub the zombie in Day of the Dead. The movie should have been called Zombie Messiah, since a gas attendant zombie appears to be the leader in the next step of the zombie evolution as he starts relearning how to use tools and weapons and gets a horde of zombies to follow him in an attack on the city. This zombie movie takes place when the zombies have pretty much taken over the world and the rich lead by Dennis Hopper are living the fine life in a fancy walled in city while lower class citizens go out into the world of zombies to bring back stuff for the rich. So I guess you could say that it has references to the lower classes rising up against the upper class in the form of Zombies basically starting a revolution. Simon Baker stars as one of these warriors that drives around in a armoured bus taking out zombies on supply missions. The movie is a mixed bag because it fails in bringing the fear that most zombie movies create. The film chooses to focus on a side story involving the main character going out to stop one of his former partners from blowing up the city. The characters are too well armed and the city too protected for most of the film so you don't get the sense of peril that you should out of a zombie movie. The movie picks up a little towards the end when the zombies led by their Messiah (thought he was actually going to walk on water at one point) leads them across the water to assault the city . These scenes were interesting, but were pretty much too little to late to make this a great movie. An interesting concept that just didn't really work effectively despite having a few cool scenes here and there.
The 5 Worst movies from 2004-2008: Too rip off cash grabs, a terrible American Idol satire, one of the worst zombie movies ever and a movie about disappearing dog poop. The Worst movie of 2008 Alan Quatermain and the Temple of Skulls 1 out of 10
I so would love one of these low budget Indiana Jones wannabes to actually be good. The poster looks great ---the movie does not. It was clearly just an extremely week attempt at cashing in on the Crystal Skull. It was just an uninspired mess that honestly was just a DVD cash grab the same way the old cartoons that you would see at the grocery store DVD bind that would rip off the recent Disney movies.
The Worst movie of 2007 Alien vs Hunter 0 out of 10
A nearly unwatchable Aliens vs Predator Rip-off. The Poster is a total rip-off ...too bad the movie wasn't. Instead we get a movie that looks like it has a $2 budget. I dare anyone to try and survive this movie all the way through from start to finish. Even the Great American Hero couldn't save this movie.
This movie was supposed to be a satire about American Idol and America in general. I've seen many positive reviews about this movie and I just don't get it at all. Despite having Hugh Grant this movie was just unwatchable. If I want satire I'll just watch The Simpsons or Family Guy instead of this dull dud.
The Worst movie of 2005 Day of the Dead 2 : Contaguim 2 out of 10
This was just an extremely odd, ill conceived and uninteresting movie.
Another classic Jack Black turd about a guy that invents something that gets rid of dog turds. I just wanted to get rid of this movie. The story was just terrible and the movie was just not funny. Not funny at all. This movie was a pile of sh.. Jack Black did something unheard of. He found his way into 2 of the worst movies of the last 10 years.
I'm always making lists of my Top movies of the year or my favorite action movies or favorite comedies. After a couple of really bad movies lately I thought it was time for a worst of least. So below is a least of the movies that were at the bottom of the last 10 years. These movies achieved the status of worst movie of the year (out of the movies I saw for those years).
The Worst movie of 2013 so far goes to Blast Vegas 1 out of 10
This movie was absolutely terrible and came fresh on the heels of Sharknado (a so bad it was good gem). There is nothing good to say about this terrible film......But I wrote about it anyway in a previous blog
The Worst movie of 2012 Jules Verne's Mysterious Island 0 out of 10
If you thought Blast Vegas was terrible wait until you see this dreadful movie that blasphemously has Jules Verne's name on it. This one got a 0 out of 10 which is very rare. For my thoughts on this turkey....go here
The Worst movie of 2010 Gulliver's Travel 1 out of 10
This movie cemented for me the fact that I'm not a fan of Jack Black. He has starred in 3 of the worst movies I've ever seen. As a supporting character in a movie he is ok. As a lead NOT SO MUCH. For more on this movie that currently sits as the worst movie I saw in 2010.....go here.
Bruce Willis must have enjoyed making 12 Monkeys. When he saw the script for this movie near remake he signed up for it again. This sci-fi movie is part12 Monkeys, a little bit Terminator, a little bit (Twilight Zone) and a little bit Logan's Run.
Part Terminator/ 12 Monkeys
The main character (played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is a hit man in the year 2044, whose job is to kill people sent back in time by the mob in order for them to be killed without it being tracked in the more advanced future. He is called a Looper because eventually his older self will be sent back to be killed and close the loop and he will then be retired at an early age to enjoy his life. Everything goes to hell for him when his older self (Bruce Willis) is sent back as one of his victims and gets the drop on him. The movie has an interesting plot even though it is derivative of so many previous sci-fi films.
His older self has come back in order to kill one of 3 kids that will eventually become a Hitler type of evil syndicate ruler in the future. This brings up the ethical dilemma of whether it is worth killing 2 innocent kids in order to make sure the one evil one doesn't live to become the villain that he does. The future version of the character is set on killing the kid since he will eventually be responsible for killing the innocent women he loves. The younger self wants to kill the older version in order to restore his current life and so is protecting the kid.
Part Logan's Run
While all of this is happening his fellow Loopers are trying to chase both version of him down. I find it not too coincidental that he comes back 30 years from the future (30 years was the age in the movie when you were supposed to die in Logan's Run)
Part Twilight Zone Episode --It's A Good Life
Well the kid turns out to have special telekinetic powers almost to the point of Billy Mummy's character from that famous old Twilight Zone episode where he wishes people out in the cornfield. The movie ends with the younger version sacrificing himself and letting the kid live. His thought process is that the mom dying trying to save him will be what sends him down the bad path. Personally I think this was flawed, wishful thinking. The kid had already shown a dark side. I don't believe the mother's love was going to be enough to keep this kid from becoming the villain in the future that he does. I think the kid should have been eliminated. You don't let the kid that can make people explode with his mind live in hopes that the mom can make him a better person. He has already murdered people. Anyway it was an entertaining movie --very much along the lines of a 12 Monkeys, yet not as good.
A Security expert (played by Adrian Paul) is sent to check on a group of scientist in the desert that contact has been lost with. Instead all he runs into is a hot blond and a mystery. The experiment that scientists were working on was drilling into the Earth's crust and while doing so they unleashed something. It may be a strange gas that is causing hallucinations or it may be a the gateway to hell. Anyway things aren't quite what they seem and the movie does a pretty good job of making you constantly change your opinion of what is really going on. The movie would have had a perfect ending if it had ended about 5 minutes earlier than it did, but it felt like pulling and putting the rug out from underneath you a few more times. It probably would have been an 8 out of 10 for me if it had ended at the right point. Still it was an interesting movie that engaged my attention.
It starts out promising with some over the top bas Asylum special effects that include a car tumbling out of control down Lombard street in San Francisco and then a small zombie uprising on Alcatraz. Here is a rundown of what is good and bad about this zombie film.
List of what I liked in the movie:
1. The Best thing in the movie was Danny Trejo who has carved out a niche for himself ever since he started showing up in Robert Rodriquez movies. He would of probably ended up a forgotten supporting actor and now stars in C movies as well as the occasional theatrical release. Watching him kick zombie ass is entertaining.
2. Some of the cheesy, over the top bad Asylum special effects can be entertaining. The car crashing in Frisco and the later Red Car Trolley crash were funny for their cheesiness.
3. The movie attempted to bring in some known actors to the cast Mariel Hemmingway, Danny Trejo, French Stewart, Ethan Suplee and LeVar Burton--which added a little bit to the movie.
Things I didn't like:
1. The pacing at the start of the movie was decent and I had hopes it might actually be fairly entertaining , but then it got worse and the story began to drag once they left the prison. All Zombie movies will now suffer in comparison to the Walking Dead. The first 2 episodes of this years The Walking Dead blow away anything in this zombie movie. It is hard to walk badly choreographed fight scenes in a movie while we get kick ass scenes like Zombies falling through the ceiling on a TV show.
2. The Zombie makeup felt like it was almost an after thought. You feel like you are at a local zombie walk instead of watching a zombie movie.
3. If you are going to do a zombie apocalypse movie where supposedly the streets are empty---don't use helicopter shots of the city that clearly show cars driving around like it is a normal Sunday afternoon. There were several flaws like this that were noticeable.
4. Despite the list of known actors they really added nothing to the film, since the rest of the acting and dialogue were so poor. I really didn't need to see Levar Burton trying to get all serious in this low budget Zombie movie. It isn't Roots Levar....embrace the cheese.
All in all it I give it about a 4 out of 10 for being just an average nothing special zombie movie. At least it wasn't as bad as Day of the Dead 2.
I recently posted a question on facebook asking how people would rank the top 5 Zombie movies of all-time. Well let's just say that Day of the Dead 2:Contagium will not make the list. This was by far one of the least entertaining, dull, silly and boring zombie movies I've ever seen. I won't attempt to tell you what was good about the film, because I wouldn't be able to find anything redeeming about this flick. It focuses on a mental institution that in the 1968 had a zombie outbreak as a result of an experiment into a chemical weapons. The 1968 outbreak was contained, but the incompetent government apparently could not find the one missing vial, even though one of the modern day mental patients is able to find it many years later in broad daylight in a metal flask. That is how this bad zombie movie starts. They open it of course and start turning into weird hive mind like talking zombies with peeling skin. One of them bites an evil hospital worker which begins the spread of the virus that turns everyone else in the hospital into typical zombies. The plot was lame the acting was bad and silly and the zombies looked horrible (and not in a good way). I don't know how or why this was able to use the title Day of the Dead 2 since it is not an official sequel to the original. This movie is definitely at the bottom of any zombie movie list. It was just a lazy and unispired effort.
Have you ever felt like you were living in a computer simulation?That there were too many coincidental things happening in your life?Have you ever said “It is such a Small World” when something weird happens?Well this movie answers that question.
(Possible unintentional spoilers)
I wanted to revisit The Thirteenth Floor since I’ve referenced this movie many times when things that make you feel like you are living in a digital simulation happen. My wife had never seen it so I recorded it when I saw it was going to be on. It is a really interesting Sci-Fi Noir movie about Virtual Reality.It starts with the death of the owner of a company that is working on virtual reality program.The plot plays out like a Film Noir detective story, with a detective trying to solve the murder and the main character who seems to be the main suspect trying to solve it as well.He ends up going into the virtual reality version of the 1930’s in search of answers after a clue.The people in this digital simulation don’t know they are in a simulation (It is there world).The revelation of this fact completely rocks the one character in the simulation that discovers this fact.The movie has some cool twists, including a big wow moment reveal.It was fun to re-watch it knowing the twist to see the excellent foundation laid down throughout the film that you may not catch the first time around.I love the noir feel to the film and love the high concept storyline.I love films like Truman Show, Dark City, and Eternal Sunshine for the Spotless Mind, oranything based on a Phillip K. Dick book. This movie made me think of several Sci-Fi books that I've read in the past. If you are a fan of Sci-fi or film Noir check this film out.I think it is an under appreciated film.