Flashback Friday Movie Review: Gumball Rally 1976 5 out of 10

Gumball Rally 1976    5 out of 10

A group of drivers take part in an illegal cross country road race.

The movie was inspired by an actual race called Cannonball Baker Sea-To-Shining-Sea- Memorial Trophy Dash.  This race inspired several films including Cannonball also 1976 , Cannonball Run 1981 and it's sequel.  The official tagline heads  " It's a hilarious coast to coast, 180 mile an hour,  go -for- broke, outrageous road race with the world's most  expensive cars. And it's all just for the glory and a gumball machine"    The problem for me is that I found the film neither hilarious or outrageous at any time.  As a cross country road race type film it may have been one of the first.....But definitely for me doesn't stand out as one of the best.  It was a decent film--but was really missing the humor that the poster suggests and that later similar films pulled off.  And other than a section where a couple cars raced down the water channel....the racing wasn't all that interesting either.

If you are a fan of this style of film it may be a rental---but I'd watch of the other funnier road race films first.

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The Battles of Godzilla: Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla 1974 out of 10

Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla   1974 4 out of 10

The Franchise

This entry in the Godzilla franchise is the 14th in the series and is  a jumbled mess.   The one consistent thing in the franchise is that it features cheesy looking monsters as played by stuntman in rubber suits doing goofy WWE wrestling moves on top of set with models of cities.   Other than that the movie series has no continuity to speak of. All the movies are written as if none of the other sequels exist.  Godzilla can be good and protecting Japan in one movie and evil in the next.  It makes no sense, but you can always expect some silly enjoyable battle scenes.     

The Plot

  This movie had a crazy mixed up plot about some outer space monkeymen (in bad Gorilla masks)  trying to use Mechagodzilla to take over the world.   Godzilla is a good guy in this goofy flick in which he and another Guardian monster called King Caesar (that looks look a guy in a dog costume with bat ears)  battle Mechagodzilla.  It features a bunch of mixed in elements like some characters escaping the underground liar of the James Bond like Monkeyman villians. There is also a  strange song that seems completely out of place that is used to summon the  cheesy Dog Monster.  The battle scenes are decent and really the only reason to watch these movies, but the conclusion where Godzilla uses electricity from lightning to turn himself into a magnet and pull Mechagodzilla to his doom was super dorky.

The Beast Must Die 1974 7 out of 10

The Beast Must Die 1974   7 out of 10

A millionaire invites a group of people to spend time at his mansion.  One of them he claims is a werewolf and he is determined to figure out which one by the end of the weekend and hunt and kill them.  "The beast must die"  he  loudly proclaims in overly dramatic fashion.  The film is kinda of cheesy and yet kind of interesting at the same time. It is more of a who done it with a twist than a horror movie with a little bit of The Most Dangerous game thrown in.    The main actor played Calvin Lockhart is so over the top that I found his performance enjoyable.  The film also features horror legend Peter Cushing as one of the possible werewolves.   The end of the movie the 4th wall is broken during a 30 second werewolf break where the audience is asked to guess how the werewolf is like some cheesy Castle Films stunt.  Enjoyable nachos with 1970's cheesy sauce.  

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Doll Squad 1973 3 out of 10

The Doll Squad 1973  3 out of 10

The Description

According to the description which made me hit record on the DVR the movie was  about bikini clad assassins taking on a saboteur.  This low budget attempt at a spy movie features a group of women that are a part of  an elite unit that is enlisted to take out a sinister ex agent that is trying to threaten the world.  

The Movie

The movie itself is quite dull,  despite the sound track that tries to make you think that  something interesting is happening at all time.  Someone walking up a staircase isn't exciting just because there is a hip non-stop drum beat in the background.  Almost every single scene has this fake James Bond  music attempting to fool the viewer into thinking something exciting is going on when nothing exciting is.  The movie even has a terrible sounding Bond wannabe song in the end credits that was almost laughable.    

The Acting

The acting is  pretty bad which you can get a sense of in the trailer  (Not SO Bad it is Good unfortunately).    The action in the movie is silly and cheeseball.   The action scenes feel like something out of a badly choreographed episode of the A-Team.  This movie may have inspired the TV series Charlie's Angels (a much better product)   and Quentin Tarantino was influenced  by it when coming up with the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad in Kill Bill. (the film didn't seem like anything inspiration worthy to me).  

The villain has a plan to take over the world by releasing rats with the plague strategically throughout the world , luckily the Doll Squad wearing outfits out of a Bruce Lee Kung Fu movie assault his compound and save the world before his fiendish plot can take place..

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The House of Seven Corpses 1974 6 out of 10

The House of Seven Corpses   1974   6 out of 10

The movie looks and feels very much like the era it was made in.  It is defintely a 1970's B horror movie.   The story focuses on a film crew that is filming their low budget horror movie at a house that has had 7 people die mysterious deaths at.  They are warned by the caretaker (and don't listen).   One of them finds an old book of the dead, which if you find you should never read passages from.   Nothing ever good comes from reading from a Book of the Dead, especially if it is from Tibet.  And when you see a picture like this hanging in one of the bedrooms......Also not a good sign.

This picture lead to a great sample of bad acting and dialogue which are throughout the film and which made it go from just being bad to sort of entertaining.  

Movie quote of the after evil cat painting makes cat scratch actor.

 Women  " how dare you hit my cat?" 

Man   "But he scratched me" 

Women   "I wish he'd bitten you". 

Man   "If he did I'd break his neck" 

Women   " you touch my cat again ill break you neck"

Of course all the book of the dead reading ends up causing the world's slowest zombie to rise from the grave and kill the cast and crew making the movie.   It is so slow that they could have easily  run away from him, but instead just stand there being strangled.One of the crew members ends up being the zombie which made no sense at all.  but in this silly flick does it really matter.   It was cheesy, but fun and used some cool 1970's camera work and music that made it rise from the grave of just being total 

crap to entertaining crap.

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