This blog covers Movies, TV, and other Geeky things...... Movie Reviews (over 3,400 movies rated so far) Countdowns of my top movies by year.... and much more.
Showing posts with label Bad Sci fi movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bad Sci fi movies. Show all posts
I'm a sucker for anything Time Travel Related and I got some suggested movies that came to my attention on Amazon Prime. Beyond the Time Barrier from 1960 has a great poster -- unfortunately the movie was just so-so. The story follows a military test pilot that ends up going through a time wrap that during a test flight and ends up in the year 2024 (the distant future back then). Of course as in most of these old time travel movies the future is a bleak place thanks to a plague (oh crap).
(Apparently all the mutants shop at the same store.)
The theme of the story was cool -but the plot moved along slowly and there were too many scenes of just dialogue. I felt like I've seen better and more interesting versions of similar stories in old Twilight Zone episodes so as a movie this left me really underwhelmed.
I came across this film as a suggestion on Amazon Prime. The poster for this film is terrific, but the film itself is just overly silly and not very entertaining. It is trying to be like an Abbott and Costello meet the monsters type of film or similar films from and earlier era --but is misses the point that those films had big name comedy stars and prior followings. Abbott and Costello were a team with one character playing more of the straight man role. The two bumbling characters in this film were equally dim and seemed to just be breaking in and out of celebrity impersonations the whole time.
The two Amazonian space woman in their space outfits were the only true highlight of this silly film --but they deserved better leading men to play off of. The Vegatable men space creatures that were under the control of these Space Babes as the bumbling duo called them were of the quality of maybe a Jr. high school play. They looked like dressed up potato sacks that were decorated at the last minute. The creatures belong in the worst of sci-fi creature designs hall of fame and look like costumes that were so bad that they were rejected from Lost in Space.
I would say to pass on this stinker of a sci-fi comedy.
Other than revisiting Veronica Mars this was one of the
first things that caught my eye to watch on Hulu.I like Natalie Portman.I like Sci-fi movies and it was directed by
the director that did Ex-Machina.I even
thought the concept of the movie seemed interesting, so I was hoping that I was
in for a good sci-fi film.Unfortunately,
I found the film dull and boring and lost interest in the story and the
characters about halfway through the movie.Being a completist I reluctantly stuck it out to the end.
It was like watching grass grow.Sure, the grass was some mutant multi-colored
fungus grass that formed in the shape of people –but it was still grass.It felt like watching characters sleepwalk
through a boring dream that has no purpose.The ending although visually interesting was predictable.Needless to say, this film was a real
disappoint.
Katee Sackoff stars in 20136 Origin Unknown a sci-fi film about watching paint dry in space. I'd review this film if there was anything worth reviewing, but that would just waste additional time on top of the time I wasted watching it. A terrible 2001 rip-off. The entire movie is basically Katee Sackoff sitting in a room talking to a computer.
The tagline for this movie in trailer reads " Every Second your pulse pounds they grow foot by incredible foot!" What a laugh my pulse didn't pound at all during this boring monster movie. I watched this flick on TCM with an introduction by Dennis Miller which was better than the movie itself.
A Scientist is working on some magnetic experiments.
The government is interested in the military use of the experiments and there is a guy from outer space that has come to put a stop to it. The movie is basically just a bunch of science talk and not much actually happening. It is like a really bad episode of Star Trek where they spend the entire episode talking about how to solve a problem. The experiments cause a vagrant to become a killer and insects to start growing. The movie takes over an hour to get to the giant insects and when we get to them it is basically just close-ups of actual insects mixed with shots of soldiers firing into the forest. The insects are placed in front of pictures of the forest to make it seem like they are in the same movie.
The best thing about this monster movie is the poster.
The Monster that Challenged the World 1957 2 out of 10
Ughhhh! This bad monster movie was really, really terrible. The Monster that Challenged the World....(More like the Monster that bored the audience). I recorded this based on the cool silly posters and the title. Maybe if I had read about the Giant Prehistoric Sea Snails --I would have skipped it. But I didn't skip it, Instead I suffered through this terrible giant monster movie that featured one of the worst movie monsters ever put on screen. This Giant Sea Snail isn't scaring anyone. The movie basically was a whole bunch of talk about and searching for the monster. The screen time of this ridiculous sea snail creature was minimal at best. The trailer shows a Giant Sea Snail attacking a town Godzilla style. I guess they forgot to add that scene to the actual movie.
I say skip this turd of a monster movie. The best thing about this movie is the old school movie posters. Look at the posters and watch the trailer and just save yourself the time by skipping the film.
Here is a picture from online of the chesseball monster
My only excuse for watching this direct to (probably VHS) turkey of a movie is that is was a cold Sunday afternoon and I didn't feel like getting out of bed. The original The Arrival starring Charlie Sheen --(before he made his comeback) wasn't even that good....so what hope did this direct to VHS sequel have. Apparently not much. Charlie Sheen's character is dead and Patrick Muldoon plays his brother --who along with some other people get information left behind for them to save the Earth from the alien invasion. That invasion basically consists of a couple of aliens posing as humans and some cheesy wind effects. He is helped by a reporter played by Jane Sibbett (Ross's lesbian ex wife on Friends). The Dialogue: Terrible The Acting: No one could make this dialogue sound good. The Story: Dull and underwhelming The Action: Isn't as good as TV show action The Special Effects: Totally Cheese ball This is not the Alien Invasion movie you are looking for
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Identicals was probably the most disappointing of the
recent Sci-Fi movies I’ve seen.I was
hoping for a cool sci-fi movie after watching the trailer,instead Identicals was basically a dull love
story set in a confusing sci-fi backdrop.
The story features a company called Brand New-U which
helps people find people’s closest matches that are living better lives and
upgrading them into those lives. The main character’s girlfriend is abducted by
Brand New U.He is left a phone message to come to the company to be an Identical himself as he searches for
her. The story just wasn’t that clear.The main character basically kept searching for
the version of his girlfriend that he lost.You would almost need a director’s commentary to really know what is
happening –but the film was so dull that I wouldn’t bother.It just wasn’t the movie I thought it was
going to be from the trailers.It felt
like one boring artsy love stories you would expect to find at a film festival.
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Zombeavers 2014 5 out of 10 They are right you all will be Dammed!
Our Direct TV Box died so we were forced to plug in the Roku
and see what was on Netflix. We watched a Jim Gaffigan comedy special and then my wife
fell asleep.I wasn’t ready for bed so when I
saw that Zombeavers was finally out on Netflix I decided it was Bad Movie time.
Three Sorority girls head up to a cabin by the lake for guys free weekend. The place is so remote that their cell phones don't even work (Dam). Of Course
the boys show up anyway and so do some Beavers that have been contaminated with
some toxic chemicals that have turned them into Zombeavers.Yes you heard that correctly Bloodthirsty
Zombie Beavers!
The poster for this movie is great and the trailer makes it
looks like a blast.So Bad it is good
right?Not so fast.Zombeavers is exactly as bad as it sounds.
The girls sunbath while the ominous beavers lurk beneath the
surface of the water.By ominous I mean
some bad remote controlled beavers and hand puppets.At night the girls try to relax in the cabin and hear a scary noise outside.It just turns out to be the boys coming up to
party.Then just when the film is about
to get good and the cute blond goes to take a shower she is attacked by an
angry beaver(Dam).The next day for some unknown reason the
group decides to go swimming in the lake. -because that is what you do after being attacked by a beaver). Hey let's swim in the same lake that the crazy beaver must have come from.The gang is attacked of course and tries to take
refuge on a raft in the middle of the lake.One of the guys decides to sacrifice the tiny dog that tries to outswim
the remote controlled beavers with no success.The gang makes it back to the cabin(one missing his foot) where they try and hide out from the deranged beavers.The hand puppet beavers attack the
cabin.A couple of people decide to make
a run for it in the car that won’t start at first only to have the road blocked
by a downed tree (Brilliant Zombie Beavers).Then the movie decides that the ugly hand puppet beavers aren’t scary
enough so there is a scene where the hot blonde that was attacked the night
before goes to seduce the hot nerdy girl –only to turn into an angry mutant
beaver girl (tail and all) just when things are about to get good again.(Dam)
Apparently this virus doesn’t just turn people into
zombies---but Zombeavers as well (with big beaver teeth). The
rest of this bad film includes a whack a beaver scene as the beaver hand puppets
break their way through the cabin floor.The nerdy girl decides the bathroom is safe and that it is a good time
to get it on with one of the guys and just when it is about to get good the
blond beaver girl breaks through the wall and bites off his male body
part(Dam).So we are left with the hot nerdy girl in
brad and panties and the other girl taking off in a truck trying to escape.
If only this movie was ¼ as good as the poster –or half as
good as the trailer. All the good beaver jokes are in the trailer.
Oh well I knew what I was getting into.How good could a movie called Zombeavers
really be.
Watch the trailerSkip the movie ---unless you are desperate for some bad angry beaver
action.
The Darkest Hour gets off to a great start. The movie follows several young Americans that are in Russia after a business deal goes wrong, when all of a sudden these mysterious jellyfish like objects start descending from the sky.
It turns out these objects are alien beings that start striking and disintegrating people. The concept for these aliens was orginal as the aliens remain mainly unseen until they approach and lights flicker before they strike as beams of light. The interesting concept quickly turned into a dull end of the world type movie with only a few cast members wandering around empty streets. A big problem with the plot was the timeline --as the characters try and make there way across the city they encounter other survivors that seem like they have been around and battling the creatures for months. It is just sad because the movie seemed like it had a lot of potential and as the movie went along that potential fell apart with dull scenes and a meandering storyline. It almost felt like the movie started out with a decent budget and they ran out of money halfway through the film and started cutting corners.
I was working my way through a bunch of bad Japanese stuntman in a Godzilla suit movies on a Chiller TV Godzilla marathon and after about 3 of those --decided to switch things up a little and watch some Giant CGI sharks battle it out. Megashark vs Mechashark is the third movie in the Megashark franchise and wow was this 3rd installment terrible. The movie poster is awesome and I'm always up for a bad shark movie---but this was really, really bad (unfortunately just bad and not so bad it is good like Sharknado was).
The movie stars a couple of recognizable actors that I have enjoyed in other projects, Elizabeth Rohm (from Angel) and Christopher Judge (from Stargate SG1) . Unfortunately they spend the entire first half of the movie sitting in chairs talking to each other via intercoms. This doesn't give them much to do other than read bad dialogue to each other. Debbie Gibson is also back in a role that literally adds nothing to the movie. The plot was totally predictable, after all the previous Megashark attacks the government decides to build a mechanical shark to battle the Megashark which Elizabeth's character (Rosie) pilots with the help of a computer that sounds like KITT from Knight Rider. Well things go wrong after a couple of lackluster battles between the 2 sharks and the Robot shark loses its programming and goes on a rampage through what is supposed to be Sydney, Australia , but is actually Long Beach CA. It was just a really boring and dull giant shark movie that even had a dull and boring climax that wasn't much better than the dreadful low budget Super Shark. I guess I should have just kept watching the bad Godzilla movies instead.....
The Mole People is your typical scientists discover a hidden or lost world underground society, that is run by a tribe of Albinos, that mistake them for gods, then decide they aren't gods after all and try to kill them movie. The fight scenes are like something out of the 1960's Batman TV series with the scientists using their flashlight to ward them away. The scientists discover that the Albinos have enslaved a race of goofy looking Mole People to harvest the mushrooms they live on. The Mole People on the awesome movie posters above turn out not to be all that menacing or even bad after all.The scientists are just looking to escape this underground realm and take with them a cute blond that for some reason isn't an Albino (Genetic Freak). The scientists eventually free the Mole People from their slavery using them to attack the Albinos and thus seek their freedom. Of course they escape (no big spoiler here) and make it make to the surface at the end all to have a shocking and unnecessary death of one of the characters at the end of the film to an earthquake. Like most of these lost civilization movies--the lost civlization is completely destroyed and hidden from the outside world again at the end. It was a decent chessy sci-fi adventure movie that reminded me a little of The Time Machine (The Morlocks) and several old StarTrek episodes. The Movie Posters and Trailer are more exciting than the film itself
"Well it was no Sharknado" that is for sure. B-Movie vet Corin Nemec stars as a Zoo Keeper. The movie is about pretty much exactly what the title says. A top secret government payload on a rocket ship crash lands in a zoo and nanotech-based combat drones take up residence inside a large Crocodile. Which leads to a bunch of Half -Croc --half robot chaos. Unfortunately the chaos is very boring and dull. This could have been a cheesy fun sci-fi film, but it fails on all levels to deliver. A crazy Robocroc loose in the zoo.....sounds fun .....NOT SO MUCH. Then the Robocroc escapes into the water park next door.....great potential.....which is completely wasted once again. It just felt like everything that could have been cool and fun in the movie was squandered. We end up with a bunch of unconnected scenes with the Robocroc killing people mostly off-screen in dark sewers and on ATV's while the government agents that came to clean it up actually end up to be behind the whole thing. It was a cool concept that just wasn't executed most likely for the lack of budget. There is a scene when it gets loose in the water park and a bunch of people are trapped there that could of been a Robocroc killing frenzy. Instead all we get is a couple of teens that were locked in the bathroom wandering around the aftermath of bodies. Like I said I'm sure it was for a lack of budget, but don't tease the audience with a Robocroc loose in the zoo and water park and then don't deliver.
It says 100 Greatest Sci-Fi Classics on the cover of this DVD set of terrible Sci-fi movies. 100 Greatest???? that is hilarious. There is no Star Wars or Bladerunner of 2001 a Space Odyssey in this collection of sci-fi movies. Instead it has movies like Galaxy Invader, Escape from Galaxy 3, The Brain Machine, and It's Alive. We are talking quality movies here (LOL). This 100 movie collection was a bargain and there may be some SO BAD IT is GOOD gems amongst the total garbage, but it will be a journey to find them. I've seen some of these turkeys previously from a different collection of "Classics" like The Galaxy Invader....one of the worst movies I've ever watched. It is probably going to take me a couple of years to work my way through this collection, so I wanted to invite you along for the ride. Wish me luck in this journey through "100 Greatest Sci-Fi classics --NOT SO MUCH"
Galaxina 1980 4 out of 10 (based on weirdness factor)
What the hell have I gotten myself into. The first flick of the collection of the 100 Greatest Sci-fi Classics (NOT SO MUCH) that I decided to dig into was the movie from the collections box cover. Galaxina starring Dorthy Stratten of Playboy fame (the one that the movie Star 80 was based on). Well what a way to kick off this collection of terrible movies! The movie posters for Galaxina are terrific. The movie ....well like the title I gave this movie series.....NOT SO MUCH.
It is clear that this movie was meant to be a Space- Comedy, but it forgot to be funny. It was just weird instead. Dorthy Stratton is just in the movie for her looks as seen below. She is a robot which makes it easier for her since she doesn't even learn to talk for the first half of this bizarre movie.
The plot of this "Space comedy" concerns a crew of space police captained by actor Avery Schreiber (who looks like a fat Gene Shallit) that get sent on a mission to find an important blue crystal. This movie is just silly. The only highlights (besides Galaxina's outfit) is the couple of scenes that were rip-offs of of the cantina scene from Star Wars. Before their mission the crew visits a space brothel and later they visit an alien only bar on a western planet where the blue crystal is that serves humans for dinner. The silly alien costumes are the only real highlight in the mess of a film. Here is one of those foul mouthed aliens. The Rock Eater.
Here is the trailer for this really strange flick
Tune back in a couple of weeks from now for movie number 2 which will be a Sci-fi classic starring Jesse Ventura and I'm not talking about Predator.
