This blog covers Movies, TV, and other Geeky things...... Movie Reviews (over 3,400 movies rated so far) Countdowns of my top movies by year.... and much more.
The single best thing about this movie it the poster. The movie is basically a cheap version of The Shallows (which I didn't enjoy). A couple of sisters that are a part of some Adventure You Tube show end up in a plane crash into the ocean with their crew. The crew end up shark bait and the movie is basically the one sister on a raft after the crash watching her friends get killed by sharks. The movie uses flashbacks between the boring raft scenes to give the characters some semblance of character development, but this tactic just becomes annoying. About half-way through the film everyone is dead when the one sister makes it to a tiny little island the looks like a mushroom. Magically her injured sister washes up and they spend the last 40 minutes on a wooden platform under the mushroom island.
They flag down a boat that unfortunately the people fall off of into the water with the sharks. Then they pull some Ewok village trick to lure one of the sharks to death with a well timed boulder on a rope which leaves two sharks vs two sisters in a not so epic showdown. The shark effects were actually decent --the story was just dull. I actually almost gave up on this film around the 1 hour mark--but toughed it out to a decent ending that partially redeeemed the boring film.
Nightmare Shark is a bizarre shark movie that aired this year on the SyFy channel as a part of Sharknado Week. It was produced by Curmudgeon Films who also did Trailer Park Shark and Atomic Shark and actually features some characters from those films. So you could pretty much say those movies are a part of a shared Shark Universe.
The story focuses on a group of survivors of shark attacks that are dealing with nightmares from those encounters that seek out help of a scientist that has developed and experimental drug to help deal with the nightmares. The scientist turns out to have ulterior motives and is actually trying the use the survivors to summone a Hawaiian Shark god from the realm of dreams into the real world.
The film is like a strange Nightmare on Elm Street with a CGI shark instead of Freddy Krueger. You can never tell when a character is awake or dreaming and in fact the ending makes everything that happens even more unclear. I give the film some credit for trying to bring something different to the Shark Movie genre --but it is almost too strange and weird.
The movie was originally titled "Curse of the Dream Witch" which might explain one review on IMDB where the reviewer said that there wasn't even a shark in the movie they saw? It could explain some of the film. In certain scenes the characters are being attacked by what looks like a swarm of flies and a weird prescence instead of a shark. I almost wonder if the film wasn't re edited to add more Shark footage so the films name could change and it could be re titled as a part of Shark Week. I can't find any information to support this theory --but it might explain how it seems so strangely pieced together.
If you like bad shark movies –then this week on Syfy channel is for you.They are calling it Sharknado Week –which has featured a plethora of old and new bad shark movies.This week alone there are at least 5 new bad shark movies leading up to Sharknado 3: Oh Hell Noand over 10 bad shark movies to check out ending with a Sharknado marathon later in the week.During the rainstorm on Sunday I was able to catch 2 of the new movies –I’m DVRing the rest throughout the week.
So today I’ll discuss those 2 movies in a Bad Shark movie battle.
Roboshark 2015 8 out of 10
SO Bad it was Good!-but they were in on the joke.
Up first was Roboshark—which wasan intentionally bad shark movie.It was self aware of everything that it was doing.The overacting was on purpose….It was tongue and cheek and reminded me on the tone of the movie Big Ass Spider.The ridiculous story involved an alien probe landing in the ocean and being swallowed by a shark –which immediately transforms into a Roboshark.The Roboshark heads for Seattle and starts to wreck havoc.
In the old days Shark movies had to find a reason to keep people in the water after the initial shark attacks.A problem I have always referred to as the ”Jaws Scenario” which usually features the mayor or someone like that declaring that they can’t close the beach –because of all the money the town would lose in tourism.The best joke about this is in the Funny or Die short Shark Pool...
“Just don’t go in the pool”
Well modern day bad shark movies have solved this problem by taking the sharks out of the water.Sand Sharks featured sharks that traveled under the sand like Tremors,Ghost Shark could appear in a glass of water or a slip and slide,Sharknado –just started dumping them out of the sky.Roboshark –uses the sewers to travel and then can show up in a park or coffee shop.The best scene is when Roboshark shows up in the mall.
The visual effects in Roboshark are cheesy—the story is silly and the acting is terribly over dramatic—but they seem to be in on the joke.The story focuses on a TV weather girl trying to break a big story and her husband who works for the water department that ends up tracking the Shark via the sewer alerts.
Roboshark is randomly killing people all over town. Meanwhile the reporter has been taken off the story and decides to take her reporting viral on youtube with the help of her daughter who ditches school to help her. The movie gets super silly after the military and Bill Glates (yes Glates) step in to try and take out Roboshark with no success.I was laughing out loud at some of the silly dialogue in this flick.
The story takes a twist turn…when Roboshark starts following the daughter’s Roboshark page on twitter –the alien intelligence inside Roboshark istrying to communicate and it turns out he is basically just ET wanting to go home….Of course the military tries to destroy it every time they are making progress communicating with it.I get the ET thing –but this ET kills for no reason—so I’m not really sure we should try to communicate with it and help it get home.The over the top acting and dialogue made me laugh and so I enjoyed this intentionally bad shark movie.Not everyone is going to enjoy this silly bad shark movie---but for some reason it worked for me.
Here is the Trailer for Roboshark
Megashark Vs Kollossus 2015 3 out of 10
Megashark Vs Kollossus on the other hand –was just bad. I guess I just feel the need to see every bad shark movie out there.How else can I explain watching this terrible shark movie.None of the Megashark movies have been good.The original caused a sensation on the internet with it’s great trailer that featured a giant shark leaping into the air and taking down an airplane. But the movies have never lived up to the concept. The movie posters are better than the films.The Megashark movies rely on clever editing to try and create tension and excitement where none exists.The movie features a Sam Jackson wannabe –yelling to take out the Megasharkfrom one of the films few set pieces inside a battleship.This film has a cheesy plot that involves some giant man made robot that ends up battling Megahark briefly at the end of this forgettable film—before a pointless plot twist occurs. While watching this film you will ask“Megashark is actually going to fight the cheesy giant robot at some point right”
You get to the fight and it is a total dud.This Megashark is a total bomb.I don’t think I smiled or laughed at this movie once---I just waited for it to end.I was so let down by this bad shark movie that I put off watching Sharktopus vs Whalewolf for another day.
