Wednesday, August 9, 2017

Sharknado 5: Global Swarming 2017 (Spoilers)

Sharknado 5 : Global Swarming    2017  6 out of 10

It started as a simple movie about a Tornado filled with Sharks. The original was SO Terrible that it was GREAT.   It caused a phenomena and launched a franchise.    Ian Ziering probably took the original Sharknado as much needed paycheck,  little did he know that a few years later he would be the star of a franchise that would be on it's fifth movie with an ending that sets up a 6th film.

Sharknado 5 tries to take the simple concept of the original film and turn it into something much bigger.  This fifth installment tries to establish a mythology behind the Sharknados.  Until this film the Sharknados were just some weird random events (as far as we knew).  Sharknado 5 establishes a mythic back story that ties the Sharknados back to the time of the Droids and Egyptians?  

This installment falls into the same trap as the less than stellar second movie where there are so many cheesy cameos that it distracts from the movie itself.  I spent more of the movie trying to figure out who the people with the bad plastic surgery were as the "celebrity" cameos rolled by.   Fabio as the Pope??  Charo the Queen of England??  Greg Louganis as a part of some evil organization that is trying to get the Shark stone that was discovered at the beginning of the film in a parody of some scenes from Indiana Jones.  This movie is a series of bad puns.  "Sharks,  why does it have to always be Sharks?"  Ok so I laughed a little (Big Indy Fan).   No longer a simple shark/tornado movie it is now part spy film with secret organizations.   

The main plotline involves Finn's son being swept away in one of the Sharknados.  Finn(Ian Ziering)  and his now half robot wife (Tara Reid) spend most of the movie Jumping the Sharknado  or into the Sharknado trying to rescue their son.  The Sharknado opens some type of wormhole that dumps them in different spots all over the world.  It makes the previous films seem somewhat sane with the level of absurdity.    The third act of the film gets depressing as all of Finn's loved ones die.   The movie ends with Finn wandering around a post apocalyptic world looking for survivors.  Then all of a sudden Dolph Lundgren shows up and says that he is Finn's son. The film ends as a parody of Back to the Future with Dolph Lundgren getting Finn to get into his truck which is actually a time machine to go back and try and rescue everyone.   I thought the ending was funny, but this Sharknado effort did more than just jump the Shark it rode the shark down a staircase while punching it.
Of course I'll be there for Sharknado 6.  I have to find out what all this Dolph Lundgren time travel stuff is all about.  

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