Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Shark Movies (The Research Part 2--The Beach Party Movies

 The Beach Party Movies 

The Big Beach Party and my little Land Shark attack  and Shark Theme --was all a part of the Attack of the Land Shark finally I got around while sitting at home sick today to put together my review of the 2 movies that were shown at the party....I was going to  try and catch up on some movie reviews  since while laying in bed the last 2 days falling asleep during movies because of Leftover Turkey overdoses...I watched about 5 movies....But i felt i had to get this old promised blog out of the way first..  So  I give you  Shark Attack 2  and  Hammerhead:Shark Frenzy -----the best of the bad Shark movies......SO BAD its GOOD!

Hammerhead Shark Frenzy  2005  8 out of 10
NETFLIX  Description:   Kicked out of the mainstream scientific community as punishment for his wild ideas, a brilliant scientist has set up shop on a remote island, where he conducts experiments in stem cell research and DNA manipulation. But his most recent experiment -- a hybrid creation that's half man, half shark and able to hunt for food on both land and sea -- is a real killer. And the only way to stop it is to destroy it. Jeffrey Combs and William Forsythe star.

 2:40 seconds in we already have Jeffrey Combs (veteran cheesy horror movie actor --think Reanimator---in a goofy mustache—and another scientist saying "Now he is more Shark than Human"
Half-man half shark enough said…Human experimentation….. Mutant babies….Good (bad stuff)….

Yet again the most random stock footage of sharks that doesn't in any way match up with the Man in the rubber Godzilla suit Hammerhead man shark and some goofy digital shark effects thrown in
The crazy Dr. invites the investors to show off his experiments progress and things go terribly wrong of course…The weird thing is this movie turns more into a low budget action movie—with the director wishing he was Michael Bay and blowing up whatever he could….
"I don't feel very safe up here" Sharks don't walk on dry land" ---or so you think---but halfman half sharks do..
Combs has a slew of great Evil Scientist lines like
"Don't worry, my son. There's plenty of time to feast. "

Amelia Lockhart: You're going to impregnate me? Dr. Preston King: No.
[looks at the hammerhead shark in the tank] 
Dr. Preston King: He is.

"Where there is a chopper there is usually a radio" 

This movie is so terrible that it is great.... The Half man/Half Shark.. always seems to be near them whenever they are near any body of water....The story is all over the place --like the director just wanted certain scenes regardless of whether they made sense plot wise....  a True Camp classic  --with Jeffrey Combs doing his best performance since Reanimator
The Hero is a sweaty old guy that would normally be like a guy with one line dressed as a security guard in most other movies

Now on to the Shark movie that rips off every other shark movie
Shark Attack 2  2000   7
NETFLIX Description:    A biological experiment goes awry once again, this time releasing a gaggle of mutated great white sharks with a taste for human flesh. Shark expert Nick Harris (Thorsten Kaye) is on the case soon enough, leading a crew to study the underwater monsters and eventually bring them back into captivity. But Harris's plans hit a snag when rival Australian shark hunter Roy Bishop (Daniel Alexander) is called in to tame the menace.
There is blood in the water the movie starts out with you guessed it a Shark Attack …2 Girls are scuba diving one gets shanked by a shark..
You see Water World is set to open in 7 days ----And this movie is about to rip off every shark movies ever made before it…
We are going to need a bigger boat --It's only a model
"Do know what kinda of media attention we could get with a Great White --Talk about a Star attraction)  (Jaws 3 Rip-off)

This movie has some Great/Bad Writing "Like Dangling a carrot in front of a donkey"
The greedy owner –orders the shark feed during opening –guy falls in and gets chomped
Followed by more Jaws 3 Ripoff---The Australian Shark Hunter Arrives
Hey they caught the wrong Shark (Jaws Rip-off)

Then we find out the sharks are genetically mutated (Deep Blue Sea)
48  minutes in the Jaws scenario arises (Yes they urge them to close the beaches --but "You want me to shut down the beaches…..What about the surf competition ----I'm not going to go to the sponsors to tell them to cancel because we have mutant sharks –this is insane" Exactly
Now we move to the surf competition or Chum..    Here are the main characters sitting on the beach waiting for the carnage to begin

At 1 hr we get the classic "Out of the water –there are sharks " Yell It's a surfer Smorgasbord
1 hr and  8 minutes  in they share shark scar tales ----(yet another Jaws rip-off)
Here is a shot from the stupid lets go down in shark cages segment
There is a daring rescue scene on a jet ski  narrowly avoiding the plastic shark
All in all---this movie effectively rips off  every shark movie ever made.....Good   (really bad stuff)
Here is the trailer 

  --if you like SO Bad they are good movies......check out these 2  from the shark genre.

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